Friday, July 2, 2010

They say, I say... what do you do say?

Ever been told that you 'should do this because it's good for us' or 'shouldn't do that' or 'buy this instead' or even 'you know what they say'. My question has always been, who are they? Who are these people who think they are so superior? It could be old wives' tales to try and keep me out of trouble, but nevertheless, this is what they say and what I say to them (the shit some people come up with...):

They say drink 8 - 12 glasses of water, because it's good for you.
I ask, do you have any idea how many trips to the bathroom this will be? I've been drinking about 3 glasses of water a day, ever since I can remember, and I'm still alive!

They say if you live off salmon and water for a month, it will take about 10 years off your face.
I say, I don't eat salmon and I don't want to look like a 13-year old anyway! If I were to reverse my ageing process, I'll just buy anti-wrinkle creams. It is the year 2010 after all.

They say (and I've heard a lot of beauticians backing this), don't use Bio-Oil because it's bad for you.
I say what the eff are you talking about? There's a HUGE market for it and, thanks to Bio-Oil, I don't have one mark, scar or stretch mark.

They say you should eat about 3 - 4 meals a day with snacks in between.
I say I don't have time.

They say Christmas is a time for giving.
I agree, BUT to me it's a time for receiving too. I love gifts and if I spend time and money on finding you the perfect gift, I sure as hell expect something in return. Agree?

The say don't hate the player, hate the game.
I say, seriously? There's nothing a player can say in his/ her defense, because you should never cheat!

They say people who smoke at the office, actually have 2 days extra leave.
I agree, so where are my 2 extra days!

They say good things come to those who wait.
I say get up from your lazy ass and make it happen.

What craziness have you heard and what do you have to say to them? I can write a book!

(Image found here)

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